Dear Daughters of Mine, a 2021 Reflection

Your future is bright and I’m confident there will be great things in store for you. I wish life came with a pause button where time could stand still, you never grew, and I could just hold you in my arms forever and ever. But as I reflect on everything life has served us, I’m here to remind you that I love you and, no matter what, I know you will be OK.

Growing up is inevitable.

I don't have all the answers, but I promise to always encourage you; to remind you to love ALL of you, from the top of your little head, all the way to your little toes, just how God made you.

While you may feel your future trials in life will set you back, I promise you will learn from them, overcome them and the end result will make you much stronger. But as your mother, I can't leave out the importance of God.

I’m here to make a personal testament to you that God is very real.

How do I know God is real? He’s real because He answered my prayers and gave you to me. He’s real because when life handed me a truckload of lemons, He made it into lemonade. He’s real because as imperfect as I am, along with the trials I have endured, here I am. We don't understand why things happen, but what is important is trusting Him and knowing that it will eventually be ok.

He is gracious and merciful, trust Him and let go. While you are very important, I would be doing you a disservice by saying you are THE most important person. I want you to understand early that there is a whole world out there and God has a purpose for each and every one of you to inevitably show us His glory to all. Look for it and seek His wisdom. He will take care of you. You will do well.

Confidence is key. But gratitude, humility, and perspective are critical. Time is fleeting, remain grateful because tomorrow is never promised to be the same as today.

Your support network is so important. Choose it carefully because they will be there for you to provide love and constructive feedback when you need it most.

There will be those who dislike you for no reason, and that’s OK. Just keep your head high, continue to be kind to them, and keep your support network close.

Your understanding of your self-worth will move mountains. Set appropriate boundaries in life because there will be those who will push you into uncomfortable places. Speak up and say no.

As a “white woman,” I wish I had more experience to help you through certain struggles you might encounter. While being biracial comes with its challenges, it is not “tragic” - as you go through life because your network will be there.

I just thank God because it truly takes a village. Being an only child myself, I’m sorry I don’t have aunts or uncles to personally offer you, but your dad made up for it by blessing you with several really amazing siblings of his own. Surrounded by so many; formal and honorary “Auntys and Uncles", all these people from many places, races, and cultures all return to one thing; they are a symbol of God’s creativity in your lives. You will see.

You all come with different shades of caramel, and that beauty is what makes you, you. I know I am beautiful as a Caucasian woman, but you are just as beautiful as a multi-racial one. Please just don't bend to the world’s Eurocentric concepts of what pretty is supposed to be like. Beyoncé said, “There are complexities in your complexions.” You are unique. You are not supposed to fit into any stereotype or category as a person. Then bloom into who you are meant to be. Normal is boring. If you want to wear your hair in its natural state, do it. If you want to be a flute-playing rock star who loves basketball and ketchup on your pizza, do it.

So long as you’re a good human with manners, I implore you to follow God and to just be yourself.

Do whatever it takes to live out your happiness.

Shine bright.